Mary Jane goes to court. . .

. . .and I’m not talking about Spiderman’s girlfriend.

I wish I was though, because then the following story would be made up and all hope for humanity would not be lost.

A friend of mine had to make a trip to the local court house to pay a ticket for a traffic violation. She stands there, waiting for her turn to go through the metal detector, watching the lights go from black to green and back again as people go through. However, this wonderful pattern, that reminded her of something similar to her brother’s Christmas tree, was broken up by a loud screeching BEEEP as the lights changed to a displeasing red. It was as if the man had pissed the metal detector off and it decided to take it’s anger out on all that could here it deafening scream. Naturally, the security guard’s expression turns to one that resembles a 6 year old in a candy store. The security guard, now beaming, asks Joe to please empty his pockets and place the contents in a plastic bin. Joe hesitantly complies and empties his left pocket, then his right pocket, and finally his rear pocket, which contains his wallet. He flashes his wallet towards the guard and then shoves it into front pocket. The security guard, who is on his game today, does not let this pass by him and insists that Joe empty his pockets completely. Left with no other choice, the man takes his wallet out again, while simultaneously stuffing a small bag into his pocket. My friend saw this action, and apparently so did the guard.

I’m sure you can fill in the blanks to figure out what was in that tiny bag. If you can’t figure it out, let me tell you. The bag contained marijuana, weed, pot, mary jane. Yes, that’s right someone woke up the other day and was like “HEY! I have a court date. HEY! I want to get high tonight. HEY! I’ll just stop by the local dealer on the way, pick up a dime bag of my favorite plant, and go to my court date.”Much to Joe’s dismay, he was not on his way home to get high, but instead he was being chauffeured to meet his new cell mate, who turns out is the reason we have the saying “Don’t drop the soap.”

~ by David on March 29, 2008.